My First Time Watching 'Iron Man'

My First Time Watching 'Iron Man'

Part II in the My First Time Watching… the MCU series, in which contributor Alyssa watches all of the Marvel Universe movies in chronological order.

  • Second movie, let’s do this

  • If I couldn’t already tell by the intro song being “Back in Black” by AC/DC, this movie came out in 2008

  • The only thing I know about Iron Man is that apparently RDJ is actually Tony Stark, and seeing as I don’t know RDJ, I’ll have no way of knowing if that’s true

  • Oh fun, an explosion

  • I know this is serious but that camera they’re using is the most 2008 thing I’ve seen

  • So, why is this fancy man even in this situation?

  • Ohhh, his name is on the bomb that fucked him up!

  • I did not expect a lesson on war and major weapons so soon, but I’m into it  

  • I’m getting a bad feeling about beard man tbh

  • Lmao, Tony is such a dick

  • His house is nice and all, but I would have an anxiety attack living on the literal edge of a cliff

  • I mean, one earthquake and that’s it fam

  • Wow, imagine what he could accomplish if all of that technology was used for something actually useful?


  • Do NOT pull that tube out of your nose, I WILL vomit

  • So this guy is also a captive?

  • “How did these guys get my weapons” do you know how war works, sir

  • Ohhh, so he’s gonna make the Big Boy Bomb for these guys?

  • I wonder if he has a plan or if he’s just gonna do it and hope for the best

  • Okay, he made his blue heart thing

  • This whole “a man who has everything but really nothing” trope is like, actually pretty boring and overdone, don’t @ me

  • Did he really think that he could just make something completely different and they… wouldn’t notice?

  • You know, it’s kinda funny that when thinking of things to make to help them escape Tony’s just like “I got it! A metal fucking super suit!”

  • Okay, at least they rigged a bomb to the door

  • And they killed the scientist guy to drive Tony’s story arc, nice

  • Oh good, he’s destroying their weapons too

  • There have already been SO MANY explosions in this movie

  • Was he wandering the desert for like, five minutes?

  • Please tell me he knows that Pepper has a mega crush on him

  • I know this is all about his origin story, but no American CEO (or whatever he is) would cut off their multi billion dollar a year business

  • Just to make this clear: I do not understand at all how this technology works lmao

  • This scene between Pepper and Tony is genuinely so funny

  • Okay, this is also the thing of “I’m in danger and just realized I only have one significant person in my life”

  • Ohhhh they’re recovering all the suit parts out of the desert, this is gonna be bad news

  • WOW they’re trying to throw him out because they say he has PTSD? First of all, yes, ofc he has PTSD. Second of all, they absolutely just want to make weapons again lmao

  • The suit is cool, but why exactly is he making it? Like what’s it for?

  • Ah yes, I just learned how to fly, let’s fly around at night, in a busy metropolitan area, where thousands of people can see me and I’ll definitely be on the news. Just a super chill, lowkey evening

  • “Give me a scotch, I’m starving”

  • Oh snap, beard man is still manufacturing weaponsssssssss

  • So he’s gonna go try to be a superhero now

  • It’s not a superhero movie unless a child looks at the protagonist with wide eyed amazement

  • Oh wow, beard man is working DIRECTLY with the bad guys. I wish that surprised me, but I majored in politics, so I’m actually pretty underwhelmed

  • Ohhhh Pepper, what you up to????

  • WAIT, beard man PAID them to try to kill Tony???

  • Couldn’t he have just like, poisoned him and paid off the cops or something? Seems much easier to me

  • Okay but when Pepper left the office it was daylight, and now when beard man is at Tony’s and stealing his “heart” it’s night? I feel like she should have had time to shoot him a “you in danger” text

  • Okay, she called his friend at least

  • “Your services are no longer required” is the dumbest line I’ve heard in a long time lmao

  • Everyone “stick to the official statement”

  • Tony:

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